Quintron and Miss Pussycat

Completely worth $12.  Not sure I like the advertising policy of The Stranger. $10 online, $12 in person. Justified by the service charge that makes the online ticket $14.75 after the fact. What about cash covers that go to the talent? It’s a terrible standard to expect your local talent to perform for free. A psychedelic punk rock puppet show combined with appropriately catchy dance music. I met two hard-core fans before the show and their enthusiasm embodied an entire crowd of fans.  The crowd itself was substantial as well.

So many parts of that I want to discuss with someone that goes to live shows in Seattle. Tracking the quintessential consumer, I’m always curious to hear the reason why. To date, the $5-and-under policy holds the most water in the real world. Choose something that’s only $5 or less and make it your habit. Video games, cheap beer,music purchases, lotto tickets, whatever. If you moderate the expenditure what could be a vice becomes support. Therapy cheaper than paying someone to listen, I play pinball at least 3 times a week. Dancing with a partner I’m allowed to slap. No better time to share the poem I’m composing…

Clackity-clack
Flippity-flap
A singularity,
Forever intermittent
Always on credit
Playing against time
Striving for an ultimate
End to the game.

Puzzling paths of
Goldberg geometry,
Blinking lights,
Chiming bells,
Blipping buttons,
Flipping flags,
Dinging dingers,
Humming in time
Syncopated melody.

They stop suddenly.
Discrete endings.
Infinite loops
Isolated to games
And madness.

Believing we’ll win every next game
Spending quarters like it’s not money
Tokens dropped into a wishing well
Validation from any available avenue
Existing in the same world parents
Felt unconditional love for potential.

No better time to finish a poem than mid-post.

Take your grandfather’s nickel comparison and remember, I once bought a dime bag for $10. It was from the guy on the other side of the tracks from RP Tracks. The Coffee Cellar was gone and my life was haphazard, at best. Untreated depression and repressed angst, it’s a wonder I didn’t do more drugs. Keeping to the mostly natural substances, I am blessed with an aversion to cocaine. I’m surprised how pure I am compared to the buffet of substances I’m still offered. Possibly the best advice my dad ever gave me, If someone’s encouraging you to buy it as their job you probably don’t need it.

I made the decision to be in Seattle via unconventional circumstances. I’ve never attempted suicide, thanks to Wade. But I remember staring at a bottle of pills for over an hour, praying my husband would walk in and ask what’s up. I don’t think eating all of those xanax would’ve even hurt me too bad. Fortunately, I have an emotional block constantly reminding me that taking pills is inefficient. If you truly want to kill yourself use a gun. Like a man, so to speak. After that hour I went downstairs and confessed in broken sobs, “I… need… help.”

The subsequent therapy and self-exploration led to where I am now. Upon deciding to move I had to break up with my therapist. She doesn’t consider my path practical and she’s not wrong. I still needed to get out of Memphis. Meeting Scott reminds me of that more than ever. I don’t regret my life and still love the people that love me. I wish I’d used some resources differently and worked harder for my goals. The result is where I am now and that isn’t going to change. Regret isn’t a problem because at the very-rock-bottom-least, I’m unique. Whether that brings me happiness is yet to be determined.

I don’t mind being someone you aren’t supposed to talk to.  That’s where I want to be. My thought process has an age requirement and I only recently achieved it. Working toward something in this life, I’m dogged with requests to have proof. I am the proof. Never one to bolster my own ego, I recognize that I’m different. The consequences of that are almost as bad as my mother said they would be. Being ostracized and avoided, I don’t mind extra room on the bus. Getting rejected by someone I thought would know better? Didn’t see that coming. Even my non-suitors are usually willing to grab a drink every now and then.

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