Knowing people are just saying most things doesn’t stop my romantic tendency to believe them sometimes. Using empirical evidence I’ve found the line between hopeless and far-fetched. Stretching my goals gives the world just enough contrast to keep me interested. Everyday people can’t conceive how far the human mind goes beyond reality without outward indications. Spending time on the fringe of society alters perspectives. For most people being altered is bad. I decided to embrace the discomfort and see what living lean has to offer.
Laws, morals and standards fall like paper soldiers when faced with things like cold, hunger and desperation. I’ve disregarded laws since last century and gave up on morals right around 2001. My standards are historically too high but permeable enough to ignore most of the time. I know what it’s like to not eat when I’m hungry in a way dieting never taught me. The minimalism of my current life emphasizes the materialism of my upbringing. Born without an ounce of common sense, it’s possible I wouldn’t have survived a less plush lifestyle.
Often the only thing keeping me going is knowing I will die trying. The work I’m doing is not the type of venture you undertake with any certainty. Continuing a tradition started long before me, the tortured artist in my soul is determined to get the last word. Expressing creativity is painfully subjective and sometimes the best we can do is fail gloriously. My current efforts are waylaid by the need to make a living but hopefully I can clamber over that block and restart production in the next quarter. Until then, I’m happy to improve my pinball scores and be able to pay rent.