Category Archives: Mecca

Marathon

Never stop moving. Just go from one step to the next until you’re done. That’s how I approached the impending month. Scheduled to work every day of August, I knew it wouldn’t shake out that way. Small concessions from co-workers broke it up into 3 legs – 9 days, 7 days and then 11 in a row. That leaves 4 days off, one of which was a dentist appointment. Working eight to ten day stretches feels like a relay race with my rent payment except sprinting and stopping is more like conditioning than an event. It’s not something I can do faster, I merely endure a set schedule. I come up for air by deliberately excavating free time well in advance.

The hard part of working every day isn’t the work. It’s the boredom. It’s being surrounded by people I can’t talk to. Free time is not longer a solid thing. I melt into the moments between obligation, finding time for necessity and luxury in weighted measure. Times like these, freedom is more intoxicating than the alcohol I drink to commemorate the occasion. A day off involves ceremony and certain tributes around my favorite locations. It’s important to maintain a presence when you are the most unavailable.

The strength of my family is the only thing getting me through these moments. Not my blood family, who still seem to stymie my dreams at every turn. The people I can reach out to when I need real help. My co-workers at Streamline and the handful of people I’ve met in the neighborhood. An ex-husband in Memphis and the ghosts of too many dead friends. There’s a certain bartender that likes to remind me how far I’ve come. Even some random dates have provided great companionship at just the right time. These things have laid a foundation more solid than concrete.

I met someone this time last year who just completed his first half marathon. I logically asked when he planned to run a full marathon. He stated that full marathons are silly because they push someone past rational physical limits. I was flabbergasted. To be clear, I don’t run for recreation. It’s a personal choice and I don’t hate on people that like doing it. But when someone chooses to run a half marathon and states that full marathons are irrational, I just assume they don’t understand the word marathon. If you’re measuring accomplishment by a specific factor, what sort of person only strives to complete half of it? This is just one of the many unanswered questions I have for a human I never got to know.

Scott Rosen

“Do you mind if your partner smells bad?” is one of the questions that matched us at 89%. He answered, “Not as important as you may think.” Looking around the condo expertly manicured in a tetris of modern American style, I’m not so convinced. Easy-going isn’t one of his strengths. And yet he seems so relaxed. Perhaps that’s the independent wealth he gained from childhood tragedy. After all, that is why we forgive Batman for spending his wealth on narcissism instead of something useful. Sure, capricious vigilante justice looks like a good idea but do you know how many orphans we can feed with that same budget? Continue reading Scott Rosen

Trivia Night

Someone on this bus smells like feet. I hope it’s not me. Continue reading Trivia Night

Is it 2 1’s or 2?

Sitting behind a group of friends playing games together. I’m at work and playing a video game. The game is a grind because nothing in my life is easy right now and my mind wandered. Only voices to me, I developed caricatures of the group at my back. The main voice, describing the game seems tall and thin. The others are a various smattering of the Rat Pack mixed with the Lil’ Rascals. I can’t say there’s a huge span of demographic in my images. Most of my visual thoughts occur in grayscale. There’s a smattering of sepia when I’m feeling nostalgic. I’m just not that great of an artist. Continue reading Is it 2 1’s or 2?

A Nice Boy

My date last night was pleasant. He’s a persistent fellow. Kept in touch with me on Tinder for weeks, a notoriously inconsistent medium. Rewarding dedication, we met in person and chatted about all types of things. He let me ask questions about growing up in another culture and I talked intelligently about yoga with another human for the first time in months. His interest in me seems genuine, even if it’s misplaced. Overall the experience was a 5 of 10 – mainly because we were at the Mecca and that adds an automatic +2 to any situation. Continue reading A Nice Boy

Good Neighbors

I knock so gently there’s barely a noise. I fiddle with the belt on my long jacket, a bulging knot of thread where seams meet is starting to fray.  I notice things like that when I’m nervous.  I kinda wish I’d taken a pain pill earlier.  I’d be more relaxed but it’s been over 6 days since my last one.  The longest I’ve gone this year is 14 days.  That was back when I had a job and steady income.  The pain started to seem worth it for once.  I slept more, drank less.  Felt like I finally had wind beneath my wings.  I wasn’t prepared for my first summer job in a port city.  Continue reading Good Neighbors

Brunch

It’s so surreal in Seattle.  People totally do brunch here but not the way churchgoing Southerns do.  It’s much more casual.  People leisurely get up and go out whenever they feel like it from 10am till whenever.  The regimented waves of services attendees from noon to one on a Memphis Sunday means you have to get up and get your brunch before 11am if you want to enjoy it.  Otherwise it’s a circus of socialites and the devout.

Restricting bars with indoor smoking to a 21+ rule forced every Midtown brunch place in Memphis to ban smoking.  They couldn’t afford to lose the Sunday family business.

Family Matters

My mother is a narcissist.  I’m of the opinion people should be accountable for their own problems.  Blaming others isn’t productive and often misguided.  Even if it’s true.  But in this case I feel the need to speak up.  I’m not the only one and I know it.  If I really want to play the blame game I’d go straight to the top.  The entire Boomer generation is trapped in a bubble of post-war narcissism that’s been perpetuated for over 50 years.  From ritual holiday celebrations to the narrow-minded legislative battles waged in a decrepit government, the trappings of Boomer culture hang over this nation like cobwebs.  Continue reading Family Matters

Slice of Life

A new source of pride in our economy is what you can do with an internet jukebox.  The game is getting your best value.  That means finding the right mix of music that represents how broad your taste is while remaining obscure enough to keep the plebeians from recognizing the chorus and singing along.  Prices are on the rise, so only real music lovers play this game.  Others use a defensive response to tune it out. Tuning out annoying sounds is a prime survival skill in the city. I’m doing it right now to write this – except I’m not because I paid for the jukebox and Freddie Mercury is encouraging me to go on with the show.  Continue reading Slice of Life