Seeing what I could be, I’m happy for the chance to die. Parting the veil makes it easy to resist the laze of wealth. Languishing in the adventure of whatever level of ass-kissing your money can buy. I’ve been there, more efficiently. Not to discount the classical discovery of an adult scampering across the ocean in search of meaning but it doesn’t take that much to see where effort is needed. Continuing to ignore universe in favor of your own ego? I’m just not that blind. Continue reading Scott Rosen, Pt. 2
They are here to break in Docs, what else do I have them for? A drawer full of things that I don’t need. Until I do. Forever saving for the chance that something considered waste will someday be gold. It seems to happen all the time. And then make another fortune making fun of it. And then use those fortunes to gain proprietary interest in one of the three major networks controlling how America thinks and make sure IT is the only thing anyone can ever talk about. That’s the dream, right? Continue reading Bandaids
Everything’s pretty much the same. Ego is the only glue keeping those fig leaves in place. If you can’t get small enough to wriggle out of your confines then grow big enough to break the walls. Every step of your way, remind yourself you have a right to be here too. And I belong just as much as you do. Agent of chaos, nothing about my observations is a reflection on you, except we are all human. Living in the thick of it, a thin line is best appreciated. Growing up having nothing isn’t as bad when you have the vast expanse of nature to explore. Scale accordingly. Continue reading Entitled
The story is complete. I didn’t find the villain until the very end and surprise, it’s not actually me. Shedding the last of my childhood trappings, I finally shaved my head completely. Fulfilling a 21-year old desire, it brought me right back to the center of the wheel. Less of a fool, I’m sure of the magician inside me. The next few symbolic roles may or may not play into the story but I’m going all the way up to the Tower. Everything after that is just sycophantic fluff. Continue reading Perhaps.
“Do you mind if your partner smells bad?” is one of the questions that matched us at 89%. He answered, “Not as important as you may think.” Looking around the condo expertly manicured in a tetris of modern American style, I’m not so convinced. Easy-going isn’t one of his strengths. And yet he seems so relaxed. Perhaps that’s the independent wealth he gained from childhood tragedy. After all, that is why we forgive Batman for spending his wealth on narcissism instead of something useful. Sure, capricious vigilante justice looks like a good idea but do you know how many orphans we can feed with that same budget? Continue reading Scott Rosen
It’s been a month and these feelings won’t go away. Is this a moment to fight or flee? I haven’t backed down from anything I want in ages and this isn’t where I want to start. Unfortunately, my aggression hinders me in this situation. He’s a guarded person with keen observation skills. My fascination doesn’t flatter him. I know I’m harmless but that does me no good at all. I wish he’d at least give me a good reason to say no. There are so many to choose from it shouldn’t be a hard question. I’m not arguing against the decision. I didn’t even want to try for romance. He kissed me. He gave me a reason to hope. Maybe he just wanted to finally see my tits after nearly 20 years.
I’m exploiting my wedge in a crack. Looking for potential in places no one checks, it’s my way of surveying humanity. People trying something new for the first time are the best forum for growth. Development happens in discomfort and the people we meet are our main source of disruption. Getting comfortable in a routine leads to ruts in behavior. Staying out of ruts is how we move forward. I’m going to a show in Ballard next week just to see the opener, if he is there. The publicist website lists the show but the venue only lists the headliner. Granted, the Tractor always puts on good shows; I’ll have fun no matter what happens. Continue reading Ezra Furman
I can hear people having sex. I’m at a party where the idea is to be loose. I can’t be loose. I don’t feel comfortable being myself around a group of people without backup. I know people here but I’m missing a partner in crime. The ability to be completely open only happen with trust. I have learned to trust my gut and follow what feels right. Seemingly nonsensical to an observer, I always act with purpose. I like my intelligence and ability to empathize, despite how sharp it makes me. When feeling insecure I use yoga and music is the perfect stress-reliever. Overall, I’m fairly put together. Why can’t I loosen up my emotions? Continue reading Garden Party
Someone on this bus smells like feet. I hope it’s not me. Continue reading Trivia Night